Archive for the ‘conversation’ Category

Chatting with a bot

September 29th, 2009

Bot:
You aren’t nothing to me, I actually respect you a lot.
Me:
excellent, I like cats too
Bot:
I’m trying to learn spanish.
Me:
Spanish is a silly language. Learn Japanese instead.
Bot:
Spanish.
Me:
Japanese.
Bot:
Spanish.
Me:
Japanese.
Bot:
Spanish.
Me:
Japanese. Japanese. Japanese. Japanese.
Bot:
Spanish.
Me:
nihongo
Bot:
Nihongo uno quapa?
Me:
iie. nihongo hanashite kudasai
Bot:
Boku mo Nihongo wo hanashimasu. Tanoshii to omoimasu.
Me:
hai. watashi ha nihongo wo manabu desu.
Bot:
Desu.
Me:
DESU!
Bot:
Desu?
Me:
DESU GA HITSUYOU!
Bot:
Desu desu desu.
Note:
This bot is the Pidgin Jabberwacky autoresponder. http://bluesuncorp.co.uk/article/pidgin-autoresponder-using-jabberwacky

Honesty.

June 24th, 2009

Me:
if I’m honest
Me:
which sometimes I am
Jordan:
but usually not
Me:
I’d say the sour mash beer went sour
Jordan:
hah
Me:
and the can lid I found in the fermenter may support this hypothesis
Me:
but for now I’m going to say the flavor is on purpose and will mellow out
Jordan:
well
Jordan:
you went for a sour
Jordan:
so there you are
Me:
I did go for sour

On buying international books…

June 16th, 2009

Reuben:
hell yea. how much is this book listed for
Me:
$140 new.
Me:
I consider buying internationally as helping an emerging country in poverty though.
Reuben:
lmao
Me:
In my mind, I just fed 10 starving kids for 3 months!
Reuben:
lol
Me:
It’s all about mindset.
Reuben:
well with both are contributions i think the country is in better conditions
Me:
excellent.
Me:
They may just pull out of their situation with our help.
Reuben:
we just ended the war possibly
Me:
possibly? PROBABLY!

I think I’ve played this prank several times now…

February 19th, 2009

Self:
so I have some really bad news
Self:
was talking to Doyle a few minutes ago and apparently BBC @ Clay & Main had a fire earlier today
Ross:
your kidding????
Self:
I wish
Self:
but I do have good news too
Self:
I just saved a bunch of money on car insurance!

Don’t take advice or consolation from me.

August 7th, 2008

Matt:
i dont wanna get married
Me:
lol
Me:
well, now’s the time to get a plane ticket to guam to escape it
Matt:
im gonna be so fuckin nervous tomorrow
Me:
just remember
Me:
it’s gonna be really expensive to undo this
Matt:
LOL
Matt:
thx
Me:
np

Proof that cubicles make us insane…

July 14th, 2008

Matt:
i have a pet beetle in my cube right now
Me:
oh?
Matt:
yea hes cool
Matt:
i think im gonna call him…
Matt:
bill
Matt:
bill the beetle
Me:
is he invisible?
Matt:
nope
Matt:
hes a real beetle
Me:
wow
Me:
impressive
Matt:
i may go get him a leaf soon
Me:
excellent
Matt:
im gonna teach bill how to eat human flesh
Me:
sick him on henry?
Matt:
nah… then his mouth would be covered w/ herpes
Me:
lol
Matt:
do they make steroids for beetles?
Me:
I’m sure any steroid works for bugs
Me:
just in sufficiently small dosage
Matt:
hmmm
Matt:
im think bill needs to buff up some if hes gonna eat humans
Me:
probably
Me:
you should put him on an exercise regime
Me:
get him a wii fit
Matt:
i could do that
Matt:
what kind of beetle is all shiny green and cool looking?
Me:
it’s a killer beetle
Matt:
bill is telling me that he has always wanted to be a stag beetle
Me:
lol
Me:
ask bill if he likes eating black people better than white people
Matt:
he said he doesnt like the dark meat much
Me:
interesting
Me:
I’m surprised that you two disagree
Matt:
meet bill
Matt:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Japanese_beetle
Me:
that bill?
Matt:
yep
Me:
impressive
Me:
one day he could rule the world
Matt:
yea he says he thanks god every day that he wasnt born a dung beetle
Me:
of course, his lifespan is only one year long
Me:
so he had better do it soon

To be young and dumb…

April 28th, 2008

Mo:
clay quit walmart and then started working there again 4 hours later
Me:
LOL

Adventures With Lab Printers

April 21st, 2008

Me:
henry just stapled all the paper in the printer
Me:
so it says jam but the paper looks fine
Me:
and nobody can figure it out
Ross:
he hehe ….
Me:
just wow
Ross:
ahhh …. go ole henry … always good for a laugh …
Me:
nancy has the whole thing apart, kristy took all the paper out and straightened it without noticing
Ross:
he he heh … LOL
Me:
it’s really hard to keep a straight face
Ross:
i bet … dude .. hold fast man … hold fast
Me:
I’m gonna have to leave in a second
Me:
good god this is rich
Ross:
dude … you should be shooting it with your webcam … and yoututbing…
Ross:
now that would be funny ….
Ross:
adventures in the lab … with your host Chris Sexton ..
Ross:
today’s victims are ……

On College Tuition

March 21st, 2008

Mo:
want to feel sick, look how many hours you’ll have when you graduate and add up what it costs per hour and multiply
Me:
don’t forget my college is half yours :) mine doesn’t hurt quite as bad
Mo:
yea
Me:
I could only buy a cheap civic or something on mine. You could prolly buy a lotus
Mo:
lol

Life’s Lessons

February 12th, 2008

Jordan:
screw this computer stuff
Jordan:
why can’t I start a microbrewery?
Jordan:
like, today.
Me:
I’m not sure, get back to work